Избиение жены в Исламе

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Кадр из фильма "Покорность", снятый Тео ван Гогом про домашнее насилие в исламе. (watch the film)

Эта статья содержит достоверную информацию о том, как избиение женщин поощряется Кораном и хадисами, с авторитетными комментариями исламских ученых, а так же аргументами мусульманских апологетов с соответствующей реакцией, отображенной в статистике насилия над женщинами в исламском мире.

Введение

Избиения жены в мусульманском мире базируется на исламских религиозных текстах: Коране и хадисах. Насилие в семье является инструментом для поддержания контроля и господства над мусульманскими женщинами и сохранения патриархального общества, в котором мужчины управляют женщинами, а женщины должны быть покорными.

Исламские Священные писания и избиение жены

Главная статья: Коран, хадисы и решения ученых: Насилие против женщины

Избиение жены в Коране

Насилие в семье является проблемой многих стран, но в мусульманском мире насилие божественно определено и оправдано Кораном.

Мужчины являются попечителями женщин, потому что Аллах дал одним из них преимущество перед другими и потому что они расходуют из своего имущества. Праведные женщины покорны и хранят то, что положено хранить, в отсутствие мужей, благодаря заботе Аллаха. А тех женщин, непокорности которых вы опасаетесь, увещевайте, избегайте на супружеском ложе и побивайте. Если же они станут покорны вам, то не ищите пути против них. Воистину, Аллах – Возвышенный, Большой.
— {{#call:[start=2]Join|Коран}}

Коран 4:34 устанавливает власть мужчин над своими женами и женщинами, чтобы те были послушны. Если жена не послушна, муж имеет право убеждать ее, лишать сексуальной близости и бить. Коран также утверждает, что пророку Айюбу (Иов) было разрешено бить свою жену.

«Помяни Нашего раба Айюба (Иова). Он воззвал к своему Господу: «Дьявол причинил мне вред и мучения!» Ему было сказано: «Топни ногой! Вот прохладная вода для купания и питье». Мы даровали ему его семью и еще столько же вместе с ними по Нашей милости и как напоминание для обладающих разумом. Возьми в руку пучок, ударь им жену и не преступай клятвы». Воистину, Мы нашли его терпеливым. Как прекрасен был этот раб! Воистину, он всегда обращался к Аллаху.»
— {{#call:[start=2]Join|Коран}}

Избиение жены в хадисах

Некоторые мусульмане отрицают, что Коран позволяет избивать жену и заявляют, что Коран 4:34 неправильно толкуют, но в хадисах есть немало примеров того, как Мухаммед констатирует божественную оправданость избиения жены, что подтверждает правильное понимание Коран 4:34.

Предлагаем вам хадис, который рассказывает, как Мухаммед причинил своей жене Айше физическую боль, ударив ее в грудь.

Передают от Мухаммада Ибн Кайса Ибн Махрамы Ибн Аль-Мутта-либа, что, однажды, он сказал: «Хотите, я передам вам хадис от себя и от моей мамы?» Он сказал: «Мы подумали, что он имеет ввиду свою мать, ту, которая родила его. Он сказал: «Аиша сказала: «Хотите, я передам вам хадис от себя и от Посланника Аллаха?» Мы ответили: «Да, конечно!» Она сказала: «Когда наступила моя ночь, тогда Пророк, должен был ночевать со мной, он вернулся и снял свой плащ, снял сандалии, положив их у свои ног и, расстелив один конец изара на кровати, прилег. Он выждал какое-то время, а когда счел, что я уже сплю, взял тихонько свой плащ, тихонько обулся и, открыв дверь, вышел, а затем осторожно закрыл ее. Я надела на голову свой шлем, закрыла свое лицо и подвязала на себе свой изар. Я отправилась следом за ним. А пришел он на Аль-Бакы. Он встал и долго стоял, затем поднял свои руки три раза, а затем повернулся. Тогда я тоже повернулась. Тут он пошел быстрее и я тоже пошла быстрее. Тогда он побежал и я побежала тоже. Он прибыл и я прибыла, но я обогнала его и вошла и сразу же легла. Он вошел и спросил: «Что это ты, Аиш, запыхалась, волнуешься?» Она сказала: «Я ответила: «Ничего». Он сказал: «Сейчас же расскажи в чем дело, а иначе мне все сообщит Всезнающий, Всеведущий». Она сказала: «И я сообщила ему, а он спросил: «Значит, ты то самое черное пятно, которое я видел перед собой?» Я ответила: «Да». И он больно шлепнул меня в грудь, а затем сказал: «Неужели ты подумала, что Аллах обидит тебя и Его Посланник?!» Она ответила: «Чтобы ни скрывали люди, Аллах знает это. Да». Он сказал: «Ко мне пришел Джибриль, именно тогда, когда ты видела. Он призвал меня, но Он скрыл его от тебя. Я откликнулся, но я скрыл его от тебя. Он не заходил при тебе, ты же сложила свои одежды. Я подумал, что ты уснула и мне было неприятно будить тебя, потому что опасался, что (в моем отсутствии) ты почувствуешь одиночество». И он сказал: «Истинно, твой Господь приказывает тебе прийти к обитателям Аль-Бакыа и попросить за них прощения». Она сказала: «И я спросила: «Что мне сказать им, Посланник Аллаха?» Он сказал: «Скажи: «Мир населению обители, которое состоит из верующих и мусульман! Аллах милует живших раньше среди нас и живущих позже. Мы, если пожелает Аллах, к вам присоединимся»
— {{#call:[start=2]Join|Сахих Муслима (Абуль-Хасан Муслим ибн аль-Хаджжадж аль-Курайши ан-Нисабури)}}

В следующем хадисе Абу Бакр (первый исламский халиф), также, сильно бьет Айшу кулаком.

«Рассказывает Айша: Абу Бакр пришел ко мне, ударил меня сильно кулаком и сказал: Ты задержала людей из-за своего ожерелья. Я оставался неподвижной, чтобы я не проснулся посланник Аллаха, хотя удар был очень болезненным.»
— {{#call:[start=2]Join|Сахих аль-Бухари (Абу Абдуллах Мухаммад ибн Исмаил аль-Бухари)}}, см. также: {{#call:[start=2]Join|Сахих аль-Бухари (Абу Абдуллах Мухаммад ибн Исмаил аль-Бухари)}}, и {{#call:[start=2]Join|Сахих аль-Бухари (Абу Абдуллах Мухаммад ибн Исмаил аль-Бухари)}}

В следующем хадисе Абу Бакр сообщает Мухаммеду, что он ударил его дочь Хадижу, на что Мухаммед отреагировал смехом. Затем Абу Бакр и Умар (второй исламский халиф) побили жен Мухаммеда - Хафсу и Айшу. Позже Мухаммед дает указ, запрещающий мужчинам бить жен, но после того, как Умар сообщает ему, что некоторые женщины стали смелы по отношению к мужьям, Мухаммед отменяет указ и разрешает бить жен.

«Джабир бин Абдулла сообщил: «Абу Бакр пришел к посланнику Аллаха и увидел его грустным и молчаливым, сидящим в окружении своих жен. Он сказал: «Посланник Аллаха, я хочу, чтобы ты знал, как я поступил дочерью Хадижы; она попросила у меня денег и я ударил ее по шее». Посланник Алаха засмеялся и сказал: «Они, вокруг меня, тоже просят дополнительных денег».

Тогда Абу Бакр подошел к Айше и ударил ее по шее, а Умар, который стоял рядом с Хафсой, ударил ее и сказал: «Ты просишь у посланника Аллаха то, чего у него нет». После этого Мухаммед покинул своих жен на месяц.

Аяс ибн Абдулла сообщил, что посланник Аллаха сказал: «Не бейте рабынь Аллаха», но когда Умар пришел к посланнику Аллаха и сказал, что женщины стали смелы по отношению к своим мужьям, тогда пророк дал разрешение их бить. После этого многие женщины пришли к посланнику Аллаха и стали жаловаться на мужей. И тогда посланник Аллаха сказал: «Женщины, что жалуются на своих мужей, не лучшие среди среди женщин».

Умар ибн аль-Хаттаб сообщил, что посланник Аллаха сказал: «Да не спросят у мужчины, почему он бьет свою жену.»

В следующем хадисе Али (четвертый исламский халиф) жестоко бьет невольницу на глазах у Мухаммеда.

«Усама сказал: «О Посланник Аллаха! О твоей семье известно только хорошее. Все это — ложь и неправда». Али в свою очередь сказал: «О Посланник Аллаха! Женщин много. Ты можешь легко найти замену. Спроси служанку, она тебе скажет правду». Пророк позвал Бурайру, чтобы расспросить ее. К ней подошел Али ибн Абу Талиб и сильно ее ударил, приговаривая: «Говори правду Посланнику Аллаха!»
— Ибн Исхак, «Сират Расул Аллах»

В следующем хадисе женщина жалуется Мухаммеду на избиения со стороны мужа. Увидев синяки на теле женщины, Айша говорит Мухаммеду, что она не видела (ни у язычников, ни у людей Книги), чтобы женщины так страдали, как страдают мусульманки. Но Мухаммед, вместо того, чтобы отчитать мужа, запрещает женщине разводиться и без дальнейших половых актов с мужем.

«Айша рассказала, что женщина, одетая в зелёное, пожаловалась ей на избиения со стороны мужа и показала ушиб. Когда пришел посланник Аллаха, Айша сказала ему: Я не видела женщин, которые бы столько страдали, сколько страдают мусульманские женщины. Посмотри, ее кожа зеленее, чем ее одежда! (После беседы с женщиной и её мужем) Мухаммед сказал, обращаясь к женщине: Ты не можешь вступить в новый брак (потому что твой муж не импотент и способен тебя сексуально удовлетворить).»
— {{#call:[start=2]Join|Сахих аль-Бухари (Абу Абдуллах Мухаммад ибн Исмаил аль-Бухари)}}
Fatima bint Qais (Allah be pleased with her) reported that her husband divorced her with three, pronouncements and Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) made no provision for her lodging and maintenance allowance. She (further said): Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said to me: When your period of 'Idda is over, inform me. So I informed him. (By that time) Mu'awiya, Abu Jahm and Usama b. Zaid had given her the proposal of marriage. Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said: So far as Mu'awiya is concerned, he is a poor man without any property. So far as Abu Jahm is concerned, he is a great beater of women, but Usama b. Zaid... She pointed with her hand (that she did not approve of the idea of marrying) Usama. But Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon himn) said: Obedience to Allah and obedience to His Messenger is better for thee. She said: So I married him, and I became an object of envy. Fatima bint Qais (Allah be pleased with her) reported: My husband Abu 'Amr b. Hafs b. al-Mughira sent 'Ayyish b. Abu Rabi'a to me with a divorce, and he also sent through him five si's of dates and five si's of barley. I said: Is there no maintenance allowance for me but only this, and I cannot even spend my 'Idda period in your house? He said: No. She said: I dressed myself and came to Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him). He said: How many pronouncements of divorce have been made for you? I said: Three. He said what he ('Ayyish b. Abu Rabi'a) had stated was true. There is no maintenance allowance for you. Spend 'Idda period in the house of your cousin, Ibn Umm Maktum. He is blind and you can put off your garment in his presence. And when you have spent your Idda period, you inform me. She said: Mu'awiya and Abu'l-Jahm (Allah be pleased with them) were among those who had given me the proposal of marriage. Thereupon Allah's Apostle (may peace be upon him) said: Mu'awiya is destitute and in poor condition and Abu'l-Jahm is very harsh with women (or he beats women, or like that), you should take Usama b. Zaid (as your husband).
— {{#call:[start=2]Join|Сахих Муслима (Абуль-Хасан Муслим ибн аль-Хаджжадж аль-Курайши ан-Нисабури)}}

В своей «Прощальной проповеди», Мухаммед сравнивает женщин с домашними животными и вновь велит бить жен.

"You have rights over your wives and they have rights over you. You have the right that they should not defile your bed and that they should not behave with open unseemliness. If they do, God allows you to put them in separate rooms and beat them but not with severity. If they refrain from these things they have the right to their food and clothing with kindness. Lay injunctions on women kindly, for they are prisoners with you having no control of their persons. You have taken them as a trust from God, and you have the enjoyment of their persons by the words of God, so understand…

Now then, O people, you have a right over your wives and they have a right over you. You have [the right] that they should not cause anyone of whom you dislike to tread on your beds; and that they should not commit any open indecency. If they do, then Allah permits you to shut them in separate rooms and to beat them, but not severely. If they abstain from [evil], they have the right to their food and clothing in accordance with the custom. Treat women well, for they are [like] domestic animals with you and do not possess anything for themselves. You have taken them only as a trust from Allah, and you have made the enjoyment of their persons lawful by the word of Allah, so understand and listen to my words, O people.

Narrated Amr ibn al-Ahwas al-Jushami: Amr heard the Prophet (peace be upon him) say in his farewell address on the eve of his Last Pilgrimage, after he had glorified and praised Allah, he cautioned his followers: "Listen! Treat women kindly; they are like prisoners in your hands. Beyond this you do not owe anything from them. Should they be guilty of flagrant misbehaviour, you may remove them from your beds, and beat them but do not inflict upon them any severe punishment. Then if they obey you, do not have recourse to anything else against them. Listen! You have your rights upon your wives and they have their rights upon you. Your right is that they shall not allow anyone you dislike, to trample your bed and do not permit those whom you dislike to enter your home. Their right is that you should treat them well in the matter of food and clothing.

Суммируя свидетельства хадисов, можно сказать, что:

  1. Мухаммед не порицал мусульман за избиение жен.
  2. Говоря о женщинах, жалующихся на избиения, Мухаммед называл их «не лучшими среди женщин».
  3. Мухаммед запретил допрашивать мусульман, избивающих своих жен.
  4. Мухаммед позволял другим бить своих жен и даже Айшу, которую мусульмане называют «матерью верующих».
  5. Трое из четырех исламских халифов били женщин.
  6. Мухаммед подтвердил наказ об избиении жен в своей прощальной проповеди.
  7. Мухаммед сам ударил свою жену в грудь.

Из вышеизложенного видно, что избиение жен является законным действием в исламе с момента его создания. Мухаммед не был противником насилия в семье, напротив, он рекомендовал бить мусульманских жен.

Решения современных мусульманских богословов и их предшественников о избиении жены

Мусульманские богословы написали много комментариев в связи с сурой об избиении жен в Коране. Процитируем некоторых:

And remember Our servant Ayub, when he invoked his Lord (saying): "Verily, Shaytan has afflicted me with distress and torment!' (Allah said to him): "Strike the ground with your foot. This is (a spring of) water to wash in, cool and a drink." And We gave him (back) his family, and along with them the like thereof, as a mercy from Us, and a reminder for those who understand. "And take in your hand a bundle of thin grass and strike therewith (your wife), and break not your oath." Truly, We found him patient. How excellent a servant! Verily, he was ever oft-returning in repentance (to Us)!
Ayyub, peace be upon him, got angry with his wife and was upset about something she had done, so he swore an oath that if Allah healed him, he would strike her with one hundred blows. When Allah healed him, how could her service, mercy, compassion and kindness be repaid with a beating So Allah showed him a way out, which was to take a bundle of thin grass, with one hundred stems, and hit her with it once. Thus he fulfilled his oath and avoided breaking his vow.
Ayyub
Tafsir Ibn Kathir
"When a husband notices signs of rebelliousness in his wife (nushuz), whether in words, as when she answers him coldly when she used to do so politely, or he asks her to come to bed and she refuses, contrary to her usual habit; or whether in acts, as when he finds her averse to him when she was previously kind and cheerful), he warns her in words (without keeping from her or hitting her, for it may be that she has an excuse. The warning could be to tell her, "fear Allah concerning the rights you owe to me," or it could be to explain that rebelliousness nullifies his obligation to support her and give her a turn amongst other wives, or it could be to inform her, "Your obeying me is religiously obligatory"). If she commits rebelliousness, he keeps from sleeping (and having sex) with her without words, and may hit her, but not in a way that injures her, meaning he may not (bruise her), break bones, wound her, or cause blood to flow. (It is unlawful to strike another’s face.) He may hit her whether she is rebellious only once or whether more than once, though a weaker opinion holds that he may hot hit her unless there is repeated rebelliousness."

If the wife does not fulfill one of the above-mentioned obligations, she is termed "rebellious" (nashiz), and the husband takes the following steps to correct matters:

(a) admonition and advice, by explaining the unlawfulness of rebellion, its harmful effect on married life, and by listening to her viewpoint on the matter;

(b) if admonition is ineffectual, he keeps from her by not sleeping in bed with her, by which both learn the degree to which they need each other;

(c) if keeping from her is ineffectual, it is permissible for him to hit her if he believes that hitting her will bring her back to the right path, though if he does not think so, it is not permissible. His hitting her may not be in a way that injures her, and is his last recourse to save the family.

(d) if the disagreement does not end after all this, each partner chooses an arbitrator to solve the dispute by settlement, or divorce.
Al-Nawawi
Reliance of the Traveller
How should the beatings go? Maybe a light slap on her shoulder, or maybe a not-so-light pinch, or a kind of gentle shove. He should make her feel that he wants to reform her, and let her know that he is displeased with her. It is like saying: None of the measures that work with sensitive people work with you. A word would be enough for any wife with lofty morals, but with you, words do not help.

Then he attempts a new direction, appealing to her femininity and emotions, by making her feel that he doesn't want her or love her. When this doesn't work, he says to her: With you, I have reached a stage which is only appropriate for inhumane people - the stage of beating.

Beating is one of the punishments of religious law. What kind of people are beaten? Virgin adulterers, both men and women, are beaten as a means of discipline. Who else is beaten? A person who committed an offense and was sentenced by the judge to beatings. Who else is beaten? Someone who committed a crime. By beating his wife, the husband is saying: You've committed a grave sin that merits beatings."
Egyptian Cleric Galal Al-Khatib Explains Wife-Beating in Islam
MEMRI: Special Dispatch, No. 2229, February 5, 2009
With regard to wife beating... In a nutshell, it appeared as part of a program to reform the wife. [According to the Koran], first 'admonish them,' [then] 'sleep in separate beds, and beat them.'...This method appeared as part of the treatment of a rebellious wife. I am faced with two options – either the family will be destroyed by divorce, or I can use means that may bring my wife, the mother of my children, back to her senses. The first means is admonishment...The second means of treatment is 'sleeping in separate beds.' Why? Because this targets the honor... A lot could be said about this. The strength of a woman lies in her ability to seduce the man. The man is strong and can do whatever he wants, but the woman has a weapon of her own. This weapon can be targeted. Many women will come back to their senses, when they realize that this is what's involved...By Allah, even if only one woman out of a million can be reformed by light beatings... It's not really beating, it's more like punching... It's like shoving or poking her. That's what it is.
Discipline. The husband has the right to discipline his wife if she disobeys him in something good, not if she disobeys him in something sinful, because Allaah has enjoined disciplining women by forsaking them in bed and by hitting them, when they do not obey. The Hanafis mentioned four situations in which a husband is permitted to discipline his wife by hitting her. These are: not adorning herself when he wants her to; not responding when he calls her to bed and she is taahirah (pure, i.e., not menstruating); not praying; and going out of the house without his permission.
What are the rights of the husband and what are the rights of the wife?
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid, Islam Q&A, Fatwa No. 10680

Статистика бытового насилия в мусульманском мире

Главная статья: Muslim Statistics (Women)

Учитывая тот факт, что избиения жен является указанием свыше в исламе, не надо удивляться тому, как это влияет на мусульманский мир. Вот некоторые статистические данные о насилии в семье в мусульманском мире:

Афганистан
Почти 90% афганских женщин страдают от бытового насилия. Насильники редко подвергаются преследованию или осуждению, большинство женщин боятся сказать что-нибудь против. «Их матерей избивали их отцы. Их избивают их отцы и братья. Это образ жизни», - говорит Манижа Надери, директор «Women for Afghan Women». [1]
Иран
Почти 66% иранских женщин уже в начале брака подверглись физическому насилию. Среди форм физического насилия: укусы, связывания, заключение собственном доме, царапанье, таскание за волосы, лишение пищи. [2]
Ирак
В докладе комиссии ООН по содействию Ираку зарегистрировано 139 случаев насилия в отношении к женщинам в Северном Курдистане в второй половине 2008 года. 163 женщины были убиты в результате насилия в семье в Курдистане в 2009 году. Среди экспертов бытует мнение, что ООН зарегистрировало только около 5ти процентов статистики насилия. .[3]
Иордания
91% студентов университетов по подсчетам Иорданского Центра по правам человека поддерживают насилие над женщинами. Ранее проведенное исследование среди женщин показало, что абсолютное большинство ЖЕНЩИН так же поддерживают право мужа на насилие, применимое к своим женам. [4]
По данным [Национального Совета по делам семьи] сообщается, что:
83% иорданских женщин одобряет избиение, если жена обманывает мужа.
60% женщин одобряют избиение, если жена виновна в подгорании еды.
52% женщин одобряют избиение, если жена отказалась выполнить указание мужа.[5]
Пакистан
В исследовании пакистанской медицинской ассоциации, основанном на интервью с 300 женщин-рожениц, сказано, что 80% женщин подвергаются насилию в браке. Насилие к женщинам принимает ужасные формы. До 4000 женщин в год убивают путем сожжения, в наказание за незначительные проступки. Ассоциация собрала информацию о 8000 убитых женщин с 1994 по 2007 годы только по территории от Исламабада до Равалпинди.[6]
Число инцидентов насилия против женщин увеличилось в 2009 году на 13%. В 2008 году было зафиксировано 7,571 случая, а в 2009 году сообщается о 8,548 случаях жестокого обращения с женщинами. Из них, 5,722 были совершены в Пенджабе, далее 1,762 в Синде, 655 в Хайбер-Пахтунхва и 237 в Белуджистане. Так же, 172 случая насилия было зафиксировано в Исламабаде.[7]
Палестиская Автономия
Запущенный в январе 1999 года проект, возглавляемый доктором Абдо, по изучению условий проживания палестинского народа, основан на методах изучения взаимоотношения людей в обществе. Результаты опрошенных из разных слоев населения и условий проживания отображают дискриминацию по половому признаку, а половина опрошенных женщин сознались, что были жертвами насилия.

"Насилие в отношении женщин в Газе, в основном, означает насилие в семье", - говорит научный консультант Айтимад Муханна. "Женщин избивают их мужья, отцы и даже братья". Женщины бьют за невыполнение традиционных обязанностей - таких, как приготовление пищи и уборка, за внешний вид, вызывающий неудовольствие мужа.

Другие нарушения включают тяжелые оскорбления, сексуальное насилие близкими родственниками и изнасилование в браке.[8]
Катар
Одна из трех женщин в Катаре испытывают всего лишь психическое или психологическое насилие со стороны их мужа.[9]
Турция
Ассоциация трудящихся женщин сообщила ужасные сведения, что более чем 80% турецких и курдских женщин стали жертвами домашнего насилия и сексуальных домогательств и тем не менее, 70% турецких и курдских мужчин мошенничают на помощи женам от государства.[10]
Государство изучило эту проблему, и в докладе "Исследования по домашнему насилию против женщин в Турции" 41.9% турецких женщин были жертвами психологического и сексуального насилия. 49,9% женщин из среднего класса населения подвергаются нападениям, в то время, как женщины из обеспеченных слоев подвергаются насилию 28.7%.
. . .
Всего 33.7% женщин рассматривают самоубийство как единственный способ решения их семейных проблем.[11]
По сообщению Объединенных Наций, в 2011 году Турция лидирует по числу преступлений и насилию против женщин среди Европы и США. По официальной статистике, каждые 4 из 10 женщин в Турции подвергаются избиению со стороны мужа.[12]
Страны южного Средиземноморья.
Насилие, применяемое к женщинам в семье южного Средиземноморья является основной из самых чрезвычайных проблем. Явление затрагивает от 40% до 75% замужних женщин, которые страдают главным образом от рук своих мужей. Этот вопиющий факт, содержащийся в исследовании, проведенном организацией Евромед по программе изучения положения населения. «Программа повышения качества между мужчинами и женщинами в области Евромед», которая финансируется Европейским Союзом в рамках предотвращения дискриминации женщин, в период между 2008 и 2011 годами сосредоточена в основном на девять соседствующих стран:Алжир, Египет, Израиль, Иордания, Ливан, Марокко, Палестинская автономия, Сирия и Тунис.[13]

Response From Muslim Women

Because domestic violence is divinely ordained in Islam, it is an epidemic in many Muslim countries. Even though it is divinely sanctioned, some Muslim women have found the courage to speak against domestic violence and reach out to other Muslim women who are suffering, although some of these advocates still deny the fact Islam sanctions wife-beating.

My husband first tried to strangle me until I fell unconscious, then he tried to smash my face.

Every violent man will be able to see the suffering that he causes and every woman afraid of falling into a similar situation will be able to avoid what happened to me

Later he took me to the hospital while I was still unconscious and dropped me off at the gate. He didn't give them my name, my family's telephone number or anything about me.

When my mother finally arrived, the doctor told her I had only a 3% chance of survival.

The reason why he beat me up was very trivial, we had an argument in which we exchanged no more than four sentences.

He had no reason for attacking me this way, but it wasn't the first time he was violent, although he had never been that violent before.

Encouraging victims

I kept silent until now because I didn't want to see my family being torn apart. I thought that maybe if I was patient enough I could make him change.

Now that I've made my story public, I'm scared. I've almost been through death, so I guess it's pretty normal that I now fear for my life and for my children's lives.

I decided to have my picture published so that it would be a lesson for others, for every man and every woman.

I'm just hoping that the judge will be fair to me and that my husband receives a punishment equal to what he did to me. No more, no less Every violent man will be able to see the suffering that he causes and every woman who is afraid of falling into a similar situation will be able to avoid what happened to me.

Some people have called me a heroine for doing so, but I don't know why.

Maybe people have appreciated that I dared to talk about a taboo subject so that others don't face the same thing.

In my opinion it isn't about being heroic, but about talking about what happens in reality.

However uncomfortable it is, it's better to talk about reality than to pretend that nothing bad is ever happening.

I believe I've encouraged other victims of domestic violence to follow suit.

I'm now campaigning with a human rights organisation which has received many letters and I have also received personally many letters of support from women saying that they will fight back.
Beaten Saudi Woman Speaks out
BBC News, April 30, 2004
Toward the end of her marriage, Rabia Iqbal said she feared for her life.

Iqbal was born in New York to parents who had immigrated to the United States from the tribal areas of Pakistan. She had a strict Muslim upbringing and when she was 16, her parents arranged her marriage to a 38-year-old man. She claims her husband turned violent during their 10 years of marriage.

When she finally left him, she did not know where to turn. Going home wasn't an option, she said.

"My parents ... made clear that they would disown me," Iqbal said. "My father even said ... 'You're lucky you live in America because if you lived back home, you would have been dead by now.' "

She was hiding out in her office at work when a friend put her in touch with Robina Niaz, whose organization, Turning Point for Women and Families, helps female Muslim abuse victims.

"It was such a relief ... to speak about things that ... I thought no one would understand," said Iqbal, who has received counseling from Niaz for more than two years and calls Niaz her "savior."

"Robina understood the cultural nuances ... the religious issues," Iqbal said.

"There's a lot of denial," she said. "It makes it much harder for the victims of abuse to speak out."

When Niaz launched her organization in 2004, it was the first resource of its kind in New York City. Today, her one-woman campaign has expanded into a multifaceted endeavor that is raising awareness about family violence and providing direct services to women in need.

Niaz's mission began after a difficult period in her own life. Born and raised in Pakistan, she had earned a master's degree in psychology and had a successful career in international affairs and marketing when she moved to the United States to marry in 1990.

"It was a disastrous marriage," she said.

As Niaz struggled to navigate the American legal system during her divorce, she said she appreciated how lucky she was to speak English and have an education. She realized that many immigrant women without those advantages might be more likely to stay in marriages because they didn't know how to make the system work for them.

"If this is how difficult it is for me, then what must other immigrant women go through?" she remembered thinking.

After volunteering with South Asian victims of domestic violence, Niaz, who speaks five languages, got a job using those skills to advocate for immigrant women affected by family violence.

But Niaz's focus changed on September 11, 2001. "I was no longer a Pakistani-American ... I looked at myself as a Muslim."

Niaz said the backlash many Muslims experienced after the terror attacks made abuse victims more afraid to seek help; they feared being shunned for bringing negative attention to their community.

"Women who were caught in abusive marriages were trapped even more," recalled Niaz.

In 2004, Niaz used her savings to start Turning Point for Women and Families. Today, her work focuses on three main areas: providing direct services to abused women, raising awareness through outreach, and educating young women -- an effort she hopes will empower future generations to speak out against abuse.

Crisis intervention services are a critical element of Niaz's efforts. Through weekly counseling sessions, she and her team provide emotional support to the women while helping them with practical issues, such as finding homeless shelters, matrimonial lawyers, filing police reports or assisting with immigration issues.

Niaz has helped more than 200 Muslim women. While most of Turning Point's clients are immigrants, the group helps women from every background.

While Niaz has support from many people in New York's Muslim community, she acknowledges that not everyone appreciates her efforts. She keeps her office address confidential and takes precautions to ensure her safety.

"There have been threats ... but that comes with this work," she said. "I know that God is protecting me because I'm doing the right thing."

There are a few brave Muslim women who openly admit the truth. One of these is the Daily Beast’s Asra Q. Nomani, author of Standing Alone: An American Woman's Struggle for the Soul of Islam, who rather eloquently refers to Muslim denial of wife-beating in the Qur'an as the "4:34 dance".

Look at one literal reading of the 34th verse of the fourth chapter of the Quran, An-Nisa, or Women. "[A]nd (as to) those on whose part you fear desertion, admonish them and leave them alone in the sleeping-places and beat them," reads one widely accepted translation. Based on a literal reading, Saudi scholar Abdul Rahman al-Sheha concludes that when dealing with a “disobedient wife,” a Muslim man has a number of options. First, he should remind her of “the importance of following the instructions of the husband in Islam.” If that doesn't work, he can “leave the wife's bed.” Finally, he may “beat” her, though it must be without “hurting, breaking a bone, leaving blue or black marks on the body and avoiding hitting the face, at any cost.”


Such appalling recommendations occur because we haven't yet universally drawn a line in the sand, as Muslims, and said that this verse may have been progressive for the seventh century when women were supposedly beaten indiscriminately, but it isn't compatible with the modern day, if read literally. Instead, we do something called the "4:34 dance," suggesting that the light beating be the result of everything from hitting a woman with noodles (yes, you read that right) to a traditional toothbrush, called a “miswak,” from the root of a plant.
Get Over the Quran Burning
Asra Q. Nomani, The Daily Beast, September 8, 2010

Objections Made by Muslim Apologists

Given the fact wife-beating is sanctioned in Islamic religious texts, Muslim apologists try to deny this. Here are some arguments made by Muslim apologists.

Pamela K. Taylor is the co-founder of Muslims for progressive values, former director of the Islamic Writers Alliance and strong supporter of the women Imam movement. On Faith Panelist Blog she states:

The brutal and gruesome murder of Aasiya Zubair Hassan has prompted a great deal of soul searching in the Muslim community. National organizations, the local community, imams, Muslim social workers, activists and writers have all agonized over how the community did not do enough to protect Aasiya, despite evidence that her husband, the man charged with killing her, was known to be violent. They have called for imams to preach against domestic violence as against the standards of Islam, and for communities to stand in solidarity with Muslim women who complain of abuse, rather than counseling patience or questioning if there is anything they might have done to cause the abuse, or that they could change in order to avert future abuse.
To be sure, domestic violence is indeed against the teachings of Islam, and murder of family members is especially repugnant. The Qur'an teaches that men should remain with their wives in kindness, or separate from their wives with kindness, and specifically that they should not stay with their wives in order to do harm to them (2:229, 2:231). It offers a vision of spousal equality when it prescribes a decision making process within the family of mutual consultation (2:233), and labels both husband and wife with the term "zauj" (4:1 and others) and describes them as protecting garments for one another (2:187).
Aasiya Zubair Hassan, Domestic Violence and Islam
Pamela K. Taylor, The Washington Post, February 27, 2009

Either Taylor is ignorant of some of the teachings in the Qur'an and the Hadith, or she willfully ignores those passages and twists some of the wording to suite her own needs. It has been mentioned before in previous paragraphs the Qur'an and the Hadiths sanction wife-beating, men are superior to women, and Muhammad did strike his wives and did not scold his followers for beating their wives.

Physical and/or emotional abuse has no place in this vision of marriage. Indeed, when women came to the Prophet complaining of their husband's treatment, the Prophet admonished the men saying that those who treated their families poorly were not among the best of men. Mu'awiyah al-Qushayri, one of the companions of the Prophet, reports "I went to the Apostle of Allah and asked him, 'What do you say about our wives?' He replied, 'Feed them with the food you eat, clothe them as you clothe yourself, and do not beat them, and do not revile them." (Sunan Abu-Dawud, Book 11, the Book of Marriage, Number 2139)
Aasiya Zubair Hassan, Domestic Violence and Islam
Pamela K. Taylor, The Washington Post, February 27, 2009

Many others repeat Taylor's claim that Muhammad taught his followers "the best of you (Muslims) are those who do not hit their wives," but Taylor's apologetic attempt relies upon the ignorance of her readers, for this claim is in fact false. As we have mentioned previously, it was actually the women who complained of abuse to Muhammad, which he refers to as "not the best among you".

Narrated Abdullah ibn AbuDhubab: Iyas ibn Abdullah ibn AbuDhubab reported the Apostle of Allah (peace be upon_him) as saying: Do not beat Allah's handmaidens, but when Umar came to the Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him) and said: Women have become emboldened towards their husbands, he (the Prophet) gave permission to beat them. Then many women came round the family of the Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him) complaining against their husbands. So the Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him) said: Many women have gone round Muhammad's family complaining against their husbands. They are not the best among you.

Taylor continues to state in her article.

The fulcrum of this patriarchal interpretation is verse 4:34. Translations vary wildly, ranging from those defining men the the defenders of women to those who render it as men being in charge of women. (The Arabic word, qawamun, comes from a root which means to stand up, thus men are called to stand up for women.) The verse goes on to say that devout women protect that which Allah would have them protect in their husbands absences. Again, the interpretations vary wildly -- from those who read it quite literally, describing pious women as devoted to Allah, to those who take it mean women should be devoutly obedient to their husbands. It continues, saying that if men fear "nushuz" (understood variously as openly rebellion, adultery, spiritual negligence, or wifely disobedience), they should admonish their wives and then separate from them in sleeping arrangements. And then the third phase -- the word used is "daraba."

Daraba is used for many, many things in the Qur'an, from sexual intercourse to parting company, from metaphorically striking a parable to physically striking a person or thing. The vast majority of commentators, have understood the meaning of 4:34 to mean hitting. Modern interpreters such as Ahmed Ali and Laleh Bakhtiar, have made a case that this interpretation is wrong.

Bakhtiar's argument is particularly strong.
Aasiya Zubair Hassan, Domestic Violence and Islam
Pamela K. Taylor, The Washington Post, February 27, 2009

Taylor mentions Laleh Bakhtiar, a Muslim apologist who states Islam does not preach violence against women and Daraba in Surah 4:34 means to send away. Bakhtiar has written her own version of the Qur'an with surah 4:34 stating to send her away. Her mistranslation of this verse has caused controversy among Muslim scholars and the ISNA of Canada is refusing to sell her book in their bookstore. Contrary to Taylor's claim, there is nothing "particularly strong" in her argument about Daraba, it once again relies upon the ignorance of her readers. To a native Arabic speaker, this argument holds no weight and has been refuted in our article Beat your Wives or "Separate from Them"?.

She described her approach to this verse in a lecture I attended two years ago. She told the audience that she went to many, many scholars and asked them, "Did the Prophet ever hit his wives?" To which all them replied, "No, he never hit his wives." This is directly supported by a hadith narrated by his wife Aishah, who reported "The Messenger of Allah never struck a servant of his with his hand, nor did he ever hit a woman. He never hit anything with his hand, except for when he was fighting a battle in the cause of Allah." Bakhtiar then asked the scholars, "And the Prophet always obeyed Allah, correct?" To which the answer was an emphatic "Yes, the Prophet was the embodiment of the Qur'an."

"Then, how," she asked, "do you explain that when he had problems with his wives, he admonished them, he refrained from sleeping with them for a month, but he never went to the third step and hit them? Was he being disobedient to Allah, or have we misunderstood verse 4:34?" To which, she says, the scholars had no answer.

Her answer is that we have misunderstood 4:34, and that we have to look at what the Prophet actually did after that month's separation -- which was to offer his wives the choice of divorcing him or remaining with him while resolving to avoid the behaviors he found so objectionable. While, she translates "daraba" as "to go away from them," (which is the most common usage of the term in the Qur'an), it seems that it might be better rendered as "to strike a bargain with them."
Aasiya Zubair Hassan, Domestic Violence and Islam
Pamela K. Taylor, The Washington Post, February 27, 2009

These conversations between Laleh Bakhtiar and "many, many scholars" most likely had never occurred, since Bakhtiar's approach to surah 4:34 fails once you realize Muhammad did hit his wife Aisha and he also referred to women who speak-out against their abusive husbands as "not the best among you". Any Muslim scholar worth his salt would be aware of this and would have little difficulty in dismantling her weak arguments against the legitimacy of wife-beating in Islam.


Another common argument is the admittance that beating your wife is permitted, but only lightly, saying the beating should be carried out with a 'miswak' (a traditional toothbrush made from the branch of a Salvadora persica tree). But this miswak defense is not derived from the Qur'an or the hadith literature, therefore it has no validity within Islam. Others base their argument for a light beating on the following translation:

Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband's) absence what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (Next), refuse to share their beds, (And last) beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them Means (of annoyance): For Allah is Most High, great (above you all).
— {{#call:[start=2]Join|Коран}}

Note that the word “Lightly” is in parenthesis. This is because the word does not appear in the original Arabic rendition of verse 5:32, nor is it inferred. It is purely the wishful thinking/deception of a translator whose work was aimed at a western audience, namely Yusuf Ali. Other popular translations do not contain this addition.

Furthermore, in the previously quoted sahih hadiths, Aisha stated "I have not seen any woman suffering as much as the believing women. Look! Her skin is greener than her clothes!", meaning the woman who had hoped for compassion from Muhammad was beaten until she was badly bruised. Aisha also stated that Abu Bakr struck her violently with his fist, and Muhammad striking her had caused pain. Evidently, wife-beating in Islam during Muhammad's life, was not something 'symbolic' or a 'gentle tap' on the female body.

Ignoring Muhammad's comparison of women to domestic animals, some may point to the authentic farewell sermon and his instructions to “beat them, but not severely,” However, what one considers to be a severe beating is subjective, and within the context of Islam the definition of a “severe beating” is wholly dependent on what Muhammad saw as severe. Muhammad's indifference towards the suffering of his female followers demonstrates his belief that beating your wife black and blue (or green) is perfectly acceptable behavior. Clearly Muhammad's idea of what constitutes a 'severe' beating and that of the modern worlds is miles apart.

Conclusion

Wife-beating is divinely sanctioned in the Qur'an and Hadiths, and is viewed as a method to keep the wife under control, Despite some of the statements made by Muslim apologists, wife-beating is institutionalized in Islam. Muhammad had no problem with telling his followers it is ok to beat their wives and had total disregard for the safety and emotional well-being of his female followers when they complained to him about their husbands. In fact he had no problem with hitting Aisha and with Abu Bakr and Umar hitting his wives.

The article also shows the deceptive means Muslim apologists use to cover up the fact the Qur'an and Hadith sanction wife-beating by using other verses of the Qur'an in an attempt to support their view that Islam promotes equality between men and women, wife-beating is forbidden and surah 4:34 has been misinterpreted. The problem with their argument is it only reveals the inconsistencies of the Qur'an, and their arguments have been refuted, by Islamic scholars and the Hadiths.

Шаблон:Core Women

See Also

  • Wife Beating - A hub page that leads to other articles related to Wife Beating

External Links

News

References

  1. Atia Abawi - Afghan women hiding for their lives - CNN, September 24, 2009
  2. Maryam Nayeb-Yazdi - The violence that may never end - Iranian.com, February 15, 2006
  3. Afif Sarhan - Iraq’s Domestic Violence Plight - Islam Online, May 31, 2009
  4. All together now: YES for wife beatings! - 360 East, May 7, 2006
  5. Natasha Tynes - Disturbing report on wife beating in Jordan - Mental Mayhem, April 10, 2005
  6. PAKISTAN: Domestic violence endemic, but awareness slowly rising - The Advocates, March 11, 2008
  7. Violence against women rises by 13% Violence against women rises by 13% - The Express Tribune, June 29, 2010.
  8. Doug Alexander - Addressing Violence Against Palestinian Women - The International Development Research Centre, June 23, 2000
  9. Qatar: divorce peak caused by women, survey - ANSAmed, February 23, 2012
  10. http://www.toplumpostasi.net/index.php/cat/9/news/9633/PageName/English
  11. Murder a fact of life for women in Turkey - Hurriyet Daily News, February 20, 2011
  12. Yonca Poyraz Doğan - Women's groups outraged by Cabinet's drastic changes to violence bill draft - Today's Zaman, March 1, 2012
  13. Mediterranean: EU Study, Domestic Violence Between 40%, 75% - ANSAmed, May 9, 2011